Yoinked this from Court

Your Linguistic Profile::

70% General American English

10% Dixie

5% Midwestern

5% Upper Midwestern

5% Yankee

What Kind of American English Do You Speak?

The wierd thing is I'm only 5% percent midwest, but I have lived here all my life!!

The Monday Blahs

Shit do I have a bad case of these. Mondays quite frankly simple blow. I had absolutely no desire to come into work today. If I can just make it through this week, I have a three day weekend coming up as it is Memorial Day weekend. If today is any indication of how this week is going to go, then I'm in trouble because today has been slow as hell.

The weekend was hectic as I had five, yep count them five, graduation parties to attend. That left me very little time for anything else. I can't complain though because after my epiphany Friday I have been on a pretty good high. Even though I did get a disloctaed knuckle out of the deal. Let me tell ya, having that puppy snapped back into place is a piss your pants kind of pain!! Thank God for Captain Morgan to help dull the ache!

I did manage to get out and see The Da Vinci Code on Saturday night. I was pretty disappointed in it. The book was so fast paced and entertaining yet the movie was slow and pretty boring at times. It was way too long as well. Up next is X3 though, and I am sure that will lift my cinematic spirits!

I have thrown myself back into one of my biggest passions, writing. I have written very little the last few months and I think It was because I have been surrounded by such negative energy. Now that I have started to clear that away the creative juices are starting to flow again so look out that you don't get any on ya! I have two short stories being reviewed by magazines as well as my first book. It is under submission as we speak. I will hopefully be hearing back some time in the next month or so. I am also trying to expand my writing repertoire by doing some film reviews. I am also going to try ny hand at doing some freelance work. I'm not sure how good I will be at that so I will have to see how it goes.

well I guess that is all for now. You are all dismissed.

No More Mr. Nice Hammer!!!

That's right! I spent last evening with a group of my closest friends playing cards and drinking heavily. At one point in the evening the talk turned to how much we have all changed, and the consensus of my friends was that I had mellowed the most to which I vehemantly denied. That of course was followed by a round of me being called pussy and various other nonmasculine names. I took offense to this naturally and began defending myself, but I was only shouted down and mocked. Testosterone can be such a pain in the ass at times. Well after this went on fotr awhile, I was pretty drunk and pretty much had had it with the teasing. I ended the night by saying that if I wasn't spending so much time bailing their asses out of trouble and doling out advice to everyone that came to me for help that maybe I would have some time to raise the hell that I used to. Well of course that started a new round or arguing that ended with me knocking one of my friends on his ass, and saying: "Whose the pussy now?" this naturally ended the card game and everyone left. Thankfully!

Well this episode did get me thinking, and even through my rum clouded fog I was able to figure out that in some crazy way, and deep down I knew that those bastards were right. I had mellowed. I woke up this morning with a shitstorm of a hangover, a bad attitude, and the overwhelming desire to tell everyone to pretty much fuck off. I am sick and fucking tired of playing wetnurse to everybody, and handing out life and relationship euphamisms like some sort of Punk version of Dear Abby. Guess what people, I dont have the fucking answers!! If I did do you think I would be sitting here! Hell no! I would be sitting on a huge pile of money on some tropical island with a naked hula girl in one hand and a Maui Wowie in the other!!

I'm sick to fucking death of always being the person people turn to when they need help. My life is screwed up enough, I don't need everyone elses shit piled on top of mine. I have been so busy trying to help everyone out to make them feel better that I have neglected doing anything to help myself. What a complete waste of fucking time this past year has been. I have wants and goals just like everyone else, but I dont see anyone offering me a hand. Well fuck that! I 'm so tired of this shit that it is making me ill. Im not a free fucking therapist. I know I used to be a counselor but I stopped doing that a year ago!! If you need life or relationship advice or a friendly ear to listen to your troubles or a shoulder to fucking cry on, then march your happy ass down to the nearest Social Service office and go whine to them and quit wasting my fucking time!!!!

I can't solve your problems. I have a hard enought time with my own. I don't want or even care to make you feel better, I want to make myself feel better. Is that selfish? Probably, but you know what, for the first time in a long time, I don't give a flying fuck!!

God Damn this feels good!!

What a Storm!

Gods, what an awesome storm we had yesterday. I haven's seen a storm with that kind of fury roll through these parts in a long time. It has been raining off and on for the last four days, which I have liked. I love the rain; the way it smells and it often just fits my mood and personality. This storm that hit yesterday was different however. It was just incredible. I was finishing up a work out when I heard the tornado sirens go off. I was a bit confused because when I had started working out, the sun was shining. Then all of a sudden I heard this roar, and what sounded like an entire army running across the roof. So I went to a window and was stunned by the ferociousness that I saw. It was raining so hard that you couldn't see more than a couple of feet. So I grabbed my gear and went outside to stand under the awning and watch this beast in all of its glory.

The raindrops were huge, almost the size of a childs fist, and they were falling so hard and fast that it sounded like it was raining gravel! I waited a few minutes to see if it would let up enough for me to make a mad dasjh to my car. I knew my daughter was probably going crazy as she does not share my love of inclement weather. Well of course it doesnt let up, so I take off running, and the wind and rain was so hard that I felt like I was being physically attacked as I made my way to my car. I drove over to the sitter's and picked my kids up dodging tree limbs and flying garbage cans. The streets had become so flooded that I thought I was going to need an Ark to get home. Then the hail started.

It was pebble sized and just came streaming from the sky like it was out for vengeance! I have seen hail, but never with this intensity and never lasting this long. When the hail finally did stop, it looked like it had snowed. The ground was completely covered. I made it home fairly safe with my kids who were all a little shaken up but otherwise ok. They all went in the house, but I was mesmerized. I stayed outside on my deck and watched the rage in which this storm carried itself. The almost deafening thunderclaps followed by the blinding flashes of lightening that looked if it was close enough to grab along with the torrential downpour was awe-inspiring. I watched helplessly as a huge limb was torn from a tree in my backyard and blown ino my neighbors yard smashing several flower pots! It was incredible.

I dont remember ever feeling that invigorated or charged up before. The fury of that storm was like a huge jolt of caffeine. Had I the nerve, I would have stripped down and ran out into it naked. Letting the huge raindrops cleanse the stresses of the past week from my body like some sort of bizarre baptism. It finally let up after about an hour. I was completely drenched, but I havent felt that good in awhile. It continued to rain for most of the evening, but the rage of the storm had passed. I felt completely spent by the whole experience. It was such an adrenaline rush. Later in the evening, I went back outside and smoked one of my best cigars and revelled in the memory. What a great fucking storm!

Hump Day Ramblings

Well it is Wednesday and I haven't blogged in a few days so I thought I would just ramble on for awhile about nothing in particular.

God, I love beef jerky!! Its almost the perfect food. I am eating it for breakfast at the moment. My breakfast of champions...coffee and jerky!

I got an unexpected visit from my old neighbor last Sunday. You know, the one I blew things with. She was up visiting her Mother for Mother's Day and decided to do the dreaded pop in. It was nice seeingt her if not a bit of a surprise. Here I had resigned myself to the fact that she was gone, and boom then here she is. Needless to say I was thrown for a bit of an emotional loop. It was really nice talking with her, but it was also a slap in the face to be reminded how badly I blew it. The last few days have been filled with self-loathing for what I missed out on. I still can't believe how stupid I was.

An update on the Tool Cd. After listening to it multiple times, I have decided that I do not like it. It doesn't have no where near the edge that their other CD's have. My son liked it, so I gave it to him.

I am embarrassed to admit that I have become addicted to that damn American Idol. I hate reality television, and in all honesty I watch very little TV. There's just a handful of shows that I make it a point to watch other than that my TV is rarely on. My daughter loves that show, and she would always ask me to watch it with her, and so like a good father I would suck it up and watch, and without my realizing it, I became hooked!! The tricky little bastards sucked me right in!. I was super pissed when Chris got voted out, and all I can say is that Taylor better win! If that annoying ass chick wins, I will put my foot through the screen! I feel better for letting that out. I have been holding that secret in for far too long....

My stretch of insomnia has finally ended, but now I feel like going to sleep all the time. I think my body is trying to catch up. I don't know why, but I go through these longs bouts of sleeplessness periodically. I generally don't mind them, but you reach a point where you just stop feeling like yourself, and feel like you are just going through the motions. Its like you are stuck in a thick fog.

I am getting pretty excited about The Da Vince Code movie that is coming out this weekend. That was one of my favorite books of the last couple of years, so seeing it on the bigscreen could be cool. I hope it is not going to be Hollywoodized though.

Well, I guess that is enough for now. Until next time true believers. Later Days

No Particular Topic

It has been a slow ass week with not a lot happening so I figure I would just ramble on about a variety of things.

I ended things with the cashier from Hot Topic. She is really cool, but there was just no chemistry. We had talked a few times on the phone and were discussing going out again, but I knew that it was going nowhere and after chatting with a friend who offered up some good advice, I decided to let the cashier know that I wasn't interested. It was a bit awkward and she was kind of surprised but she was really cool about it. I always feel like such an asshole when I have to break things off with someone, but its better than having no balls and dragging things out until someone gets hurt. I think a real man wouldn't play that kind of bullshit game.

I picked up the new Tool CD and have been listening to it quite a bit. I haven't decided if I like it yet. I like Tool, but this sounds different from what I am used to. Its going to take a few more listens for me to make up my mind.

I am really excited about some upcoming movies. I am a bit of a movie geek, but I'm ok with that so back off!! The DaVinci Code, and X-men 3 are out this month!!

My job is really starting to drag me down, and I am feeling incredibly burnt out. I need to take some time off, but I am waiting until July when my best friend can take some time. We are planning on a roadtrip, but to where and to do what we haven't decided. Right now it looks like Vegas could be the destination, but that could change before July. I just hope I dont flip out and go on some kind of rampage before then!!!

My new computer is the shit!!! The picture quality of my monitor is better than my TV!! It makes internet porn so much more entertaining.....oops I mean uh...funny internet movies...yeah thats it....

Its almost Mother's day, and I have yet to get my Mom something! I still have the weekend to get it done so I won't panic....yet.

I guess that is all for now. Later Days

What a Weekend

What an odd kind of weekend this past one was.

It started off nice with the arrival of my new computer. My best friend came up and we got it installed and then decided to go out for Cinco De Mayo. There is a rather large Mexican population in the town that I live so you can imagine that is was party central. Several of my neighbors are from Mexico so all my friend and I had to do was walk down my street and we hit several parties. Hell we didn't even make it to the end of the block. I couldn't tell ya what time I got home and what all happened. The tequila started flowing and all I remember is waking up on my couch Saturday morning with a killer hangover. Cinco De Mayo kicked my ass!!

Saturday I pretty much layed around feeling like crap. That afternoon was my daughter's 9th birthday party so I enjoyed that. I got her a new bike which was a big hit. After the party I went home took a quick nap and then got up and met some friends out. I was still feeling kind of crappy so I made it an early night. I rented a couple of movies and messed around on the computer. For the record Charlize Theron is hot, and even hotter in that tight black outfit, but Aeon Flux was kind of a pissy movie. It was 3am when I finished the movies and for whatever reason I was wired and could not sleep. So I put on a pot of coffee, an awesome Kona Blend, and sat on my front porch and watched the sun come up. It has ben a long time since I have seena sunrise. It is really an exhillarating experience and I recommend that everyone should try and do every once in awhile. Everything is so calm, quiet , and peaceful at that time of day.

Well anyways, I went to bed about 8am Sunday morning only to be rudely awakened by the ex at 10am. As you would expect I was not my usually charming self. It seem sthe ex was planning on taking the kids and a few of my daughter's friends on a bike ride. She wanted to borrow my vehicle as it can hold several bikes, and my daughter's bike needed some adjusting. No big deal I thought so I fixed the bike. In the mean time she starts nagging me about how I didnt help her plan the birthday party even though she told me she had everything covered so I told her I would pay for everything. It worked out fine and my daughter had a good time. So here I am on very little sleep still with a touch of bottle flu from Cinco De Mayo working on a bike with abot ten kids running around my yard and I pretty much told her to shut up and sent her on her merry way. In her temper tantrum she jumps into her car to move it, and runs overne of the kids bikes and demolishes it! Now stupid me, I thought that when you backed out of a driveway, you would take a gander in the rerview mirror. Now granted the kid should not have parked his bike in the driveway, but come on really.

Things just got crazy after that. Kids and parents all over the place. If I would have had some sort of automatic weapon I would have taken out the whole lot of them. I felt bad for the kid, so I ended up buying him a new bike and his parents were cool about it and they split the cost. They pack of wild 9 year olds eventually left for their bike trip , finally leaving with much deserved solitude. I spent the rest of the evening reading and enjoying the silence.

New Computer!!

Finally it is here!! My old computer died on me last week, and I have been without ever since! It was time for a new one. The old Gateway that I had was on its last legs. The sound had gone out, I replaced the hard drive and several other components. It was basically cobbled togethor forom several different systems. It s the Franken-computer!! It had no memory left and it ran so slow that I used to get pissed waiting for pages to download. The monitor was going bad which made everything look dark too.

Now though, I have a Dell with state of the art sound and 19 inch LCD Monitor with 1 full Gig of memory!! I am alomost getting sexually aroused just thinking about it!! My best friend is coming up to help me get everything up and running which should be hillarious because as it is also Cinco De Mayo I am sure we will indulge in several adult type beverages!

Weekend Update

What a cool weekend. For starters it was a three day weekend so that made it even nicer. It started off with me getting my new tattoo. It is fucking awesome!! Pics will be forthcoming. I am waiting until it heals a little bit before taking anymore pics. My cashier friend went along for the ride. She was thinking about getting another tatto herself, and wanted to check this place out. It was nice because I was there for awhile, it took about 3 hours for the whole tattoo so she kept me company. Afterwards I took her to work, and went home where my piece of shit computer died on me. I was so pissed! I did buy a new one today, but I wont be getting it until sometime next week which blows. So the only time I will be on for the next week or so is when I am at work.

Anyways, I picked my new cahsier friend up after work that night, and we went out for a quick bite to eat and a couple od drinks then we went back to her apartment and watched a couple of movies and talked pretty much all night. I ended up crashing on her couch. So on Saturday I got up and fixed her breakfast. I make the best cheese omelettes for thos ethat are interested! Then I went home got some rest, got cleaned up and went to pick her up for our official date. It was real cool. We went out and got something to eat at a nice Italian restaurant that is a favorite of mine. We polished off a couple glasses of wine, and then went to a club that was one of her favorite hangouts. I got to meet a bunch of her friends. They all seemed decent though I did spend that much time with them. We ended up closing the club, and then going to another. When it closed we were both buzzing pretty good so we went back to her place had some fun, and crashed out.

Woke up Sunday, and she made me breakfast. It was good, but I was pretty hungover so I couldn't full appreciate it. I hung out for a bit and then went home and passed back out for awhile. I spent the rest of the evening with my youngest son computer shopping. All in all it was a very cool weekend.