Ready for the weekend!!

Just like the title says!! This has been kind of a long week, and I am ready to cut loose! I am meeting my best friend in the world tonight and we are going to go pick up my new box of Romeo & Juliet Cigars. I am very excited! Then tomorrow my sister is having an all day party at her house. I am sure a good time will be had by all. On Sunday, I am taking my kids over to the IMAX to catch a movie though I do not know which one yet. Now if I can just make it through this slow ass day. I have absolutely nothing to do at work today which is nice, but it makes the day just crawl by. Oh yeah, I forgot.... its PAYDAY!!!


So hide your women and livestock.......the Hammer is coming out to play!!!!

I am only happy when it rains....

So it finally rained yesterday. Here in the Midwest there has been a pretty bad drought this year. Everything has turned brown and ugly. Yesterday, I watched from my office window as some dark clouds moved in and by lunch time they just let loose. It rained all day and night. It was as if the clouds had been storing the rain up all summer just for that day.

When I got home, I was able to sit on my front porch and just enjoy the beauty of the rain as it fell. The sky was that perfect shade of gray, and the rain came down steadily for hours. Every now and then a distant thunder clap would roll across the sky. It was almost perfect. I sat back relaxed and enjoyed a new cigar. It was the best that I have felt in awhile. It is amazing how a good rain can wash away the ugliness both physically and figuratively.

I decided right then that I was done feeling like shit, and feeling sorry for myself. I Am still mourning the loss of my friend. It gets real bad when I go to call him to see if he wants to do something, and then I remember that he is gone. That sucks, but I am done walking around like dead person myself. I need to get back to my old charming, witty, yet dreadfully cynical self.

That perfect rain yesterday reinvigrated me, and me feel so alive. Things have been fairly shitty lately, but that is done. God, I love the rain.

Word

Well I made it through the weekend. Thats a small victory I guess. I spent some time with my kids. That always makes me feel better. We went and seen Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. It was pretty good though I did not care for the whole make amends with his Ftather thing. That was kind of stupid. After fighting it kicking and screaming, I am starting to become a huge Johnny Depp fan. I don't know maybe I am going gay in my old age!!

Then I took my kids swimming. It has been so hot here that its miserable. It matches my moods lately. It was so hot, that you could not even get cooled off in the pool. It is supposed to hit 103 degrees again today. I have to work a double today too, which blows big time.

I know this is pretty much just mindless rambling, but it is all I am capable of at this time.

Sup

Wow, I have not been blogging much lately. My mind has just been on other things I guess. This past month has not been the best, and this past week has been just fucking bad. There is nothing like having a bunch of emotional baggage sneak up on you and bit you right in the ass. I have been so fucked up this past week, and I don't mean drunk though I have been that too.

I just can't figure shit out. I had something tragic happen this week, and some ass told me that it was God's will. I punched him in the mouth, and almost got arrested. I know it wasn't the best or most mature of responses but I wasn't exacty in the right frame of mind to make a rational judgement.

I had to bury a good friend yesterday. At the funeral I also ran into the girl that I really fucked up with and let her get away. She is getting married soon. Talk about an emotional overload. It was a bad, bad day. Lets just say that I am not dealing with the concepts of love and death very well, especially all at once.

Now I am stuck at work, feeling like shit, wanting to rip this fucking computer off my desk and throw it out the fucking window. Why do people die in such meaningless bullshit accidents?

Fuck this, I'm going home, I just cant take this shit anymore

My mind is gone...

Wow, I have seriously been neglecting this place. I need to blog!!! I am tired though so I will have to wait until tomorrow.

I love this fucking song!

-Jesus Of Suburbia-
I'm the son of rage and love,
The Jesus of suburbia,
From the bible of "none of the above",
On a steady diet of soda pop and ritalin,
No one ever died for my sins in hell,
As far as I can tell,
At least the ones I got away with
But there's nothing wrong with me,
This is how I'm supposed to be,
In a land of make believe,
That don't believe in me
Get my television fix,
Sitting on my crucifix,
The living room in my private womb,
While the Mom's and Brad's are away,
To fall in love and fall in debt,
To alcohol and cigarettes and Mary Jane,
To keep me insane and doing someone else's cocaine