Momentary Lapse of Reason

I know it has been forever and a day since I have last blogged, but I have a lot of shit on my mind that I need to get off my chest. I have had a pot and a half of coffee and I am buzzing like mother fucker!

Life, what a kick in the sac this is. If there is one thing I have learned is that there is no guarantee that you have anymore time than right now. You only get one go round on this ride so you better make it count. I have literally been bludgeoned over the head with that point time and again this past year, and you would think I would have learned my lesson. Well, I am here to tell you that I have! No longer am I going to waste my fucking time worrying about the stupid shit. You have to live this minute like it is the best minute of your life, and then move to the next minute and live that one the same way because my friends these minutes are we all have. There is no guarantee that you will be given a second more. Happiness is fleeting temptress and a concept that I have never been all that fond of, but the opposite, regret, can eat you alive. I lost a real opportunity at something special with an incredible person this past weekend because I was so caught up in stupid bullshit and kept putting off doing what I knew in my heart to be right because I thought there would be time. Well the sand in my hourglass ran out and she is gone and I am left here haunted by that evil bitch Regret.

You are the only person in this world that truely knows what makes you happy. If anyone else gets in the way of that and tries to tell you different then fuck them and shame on you for listening. You absolutely have to take the risk and go for it because this moment is it. Stupid shit happens all the time for no good reason. A close friend of mine was killed last summer in a stupid bullshit accident. I know for a fact that he he thought he had time to get the things that he wanted, well life stepped in and took it all away. I will be God Damned if that is going to happen to me. If you can find someone that makes you happy then by God you have to experience it. Even if friends and family think that it is a mistake, but that is their job. They look after you and they wouldnt be good friends if they didnt worry about you and want to help, but when it comes to what you know will make you happy then they have to but the hell out. I am not talking about true love or other such concepts, I am merely referring to what makes you happy. You may even know in your heart that this person isn't "the one" but that they make you happy and feel good for right now then dammit you have to go balls to the wall and live it. I am as cynical as they come, but damn if I can someone that makes me feel good then there is no way in hell that I am letting them slip through my fingers again. I fucked up big time. Who knows if another opportunity will makes it way to my door again. I wasted my minute, and it has cost me dearly.